The CEO and His Turds

Once upon a time, in the fictional town of Baloney, a wealthy family, the Kitch’s, owned a large chemical complex that employed 90% of the town’s residents. The Kitch family sponsored an annual barbeque at the home of one their employees and it was thought to be a great honor to be the host.

This year, Bob Houston was selected to be the host. Bob lived next to a nature preserve and, as a result, there was lots of room for tents and a bandstand. Bob made sure his insurance was in place and he signed the customary Non-Disclosure Agreement that the Kitch family used for all of their activities. On the barbeque day, a caravan of trucks arrived, tents and stages were constructed, and hundreds of guests ate and drank to their hearts content. Mr. Kitch showed up and said hello to virtually everyone.

At the end of the day, while the clean-up was starting, Mr. Kitch excused himself and went into Bob’s house. Bob found Mr. Kitch pulling up his pants in the living room and there, on Bob’s sofa, was a pile of turds. “Well,” said Mr. Kitch, “you didn’t expect me to use my own bathroom, did you?”

Outside, the clean up crew was throwing garbage into the nature preserve a few feet off of Bob’s property. It was already beginning to smell. Bob’s wife, Angela, was in tears and Bob’s neighbors were already objecting to the garbage that was visible (and soon smellable) from their adjoining properties.

As Mr. Kitch was leaving, Bob ran up to him and got right up in his face.
“Are you going to clean up here.” “Bob…