Hi Yael,

As a long-time follower/reader, I usually find myself in agreement with your thoughts and conclusions. But, respectfully, I want to disagree with one set of items that fall into the category of "deserved's."

Is an "adequate" income deserved? I've always thought that the first responsibility of any employee was always to be looking for a better paying job. I do not believe in job loyalty. Your job is to maximize your value to yourself -- and not to your employer. Every employee is really his/her own business and your actions -- no matter your age -- should be guided exclusively by what is best for you.

If you're not satisfied with your current job, your best bet is to find some employer who needs (not wants) your skills. If you get an offer you like, then, go to your employer (if you want to stay there) and offer them a choice: #1: Stay with a salary increase 10% higher than your other offer; or #2: leave (with two weeks notice). If your employer needed to reduce headcount, your feelings/needs would not be a priority.

The employer/employee relationship is fundamentally adverse (as our common experience with all HR departments invariably demonstrates). Management/employer loyalty goes ultimately to ownership. We all need to be loyal to ourselves.